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A Life Full of Blessing

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Much has changed in the six years since I wrote the following paragraphs.  Some good things have happened and some not so good, but the thing that struck me right away is that the first part is no longer true.  So I’m inspired to put new life into the original.  I can’t say that I go around dancing for joy all the time,  Bubbling emotion just isn’t in my personality.  What I can say is that I no longer struggle with depression.  I don’t suppose I can know that it will never come back, but I know that I am more content now than I have been since my childhood.  God gets the glory for that.  He is good.  He is faithful. He has done what He said He would do.  I put my trust in Him.  He continues to add to a life that was already full of blessing.

Here begins the original from August 1, 2009.

Anyone who has been around me much or even just reads my blog entries for the past few months knows I struggle to maintain a positive attitude and often lose. I don’t like to use the word depression. I think we tend to label and medicate for conditions that are spiritual at their roots and thus never address the real problem. Someone would have to prove to me by some kind of medical test that I had a chemical imbalance and even then I would be reluctant to medicate for it. I believe that even real physical problems can result from what goes on in our hearts and minds. If I may be said to be chronically depressed, I believe the solution is in my relationship to Yahweh and not in a pill bottle.

One strategy of the last few years has been to constantly remind myself of God’s blessing in my life. Sometimes I can even make that backfire, because I feel that I’ve been given so much and I have produced so little with it. The very evidence of God’s love is twisted into a reason why He should not love me. I’ve gone there a lot lately. Yet I will choose to remember His goodness to me. I will choose gratitude over grumbling, and do my best to thank Him with both my words and my deeds.

I am not sure where to start. Can one rank His many favors? Unquestionably, the best is the sacrifice of Jesus. At least in this country most everyone has heard the quote from John 3:16, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” (NASU) In its ubiquity we lose its full impact. The creator of the universe loved His seemingly insignificant creation so much that He came as one of us to live and die an unimaginably horrible death so that we might live with Him forever. Even His persecutors, had they repented, would be embraced as evidenced by His prayer, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34) I wouldn’t be surprised if we met one or two of them in Heaven. All we need to do is be willing to love Him back in the same way, giving Him our lives in return. He made the first move. We just need to respond. If he never did another thing for us, what could compare to that? Yet like spoiled children we always want more and throw fits when we don’t get it. His love and patience are beyond description.

He didn’t stop in my family. I don’t know how it began on Mom’s side. All I’ve ever known is a family full of preachers and preachers’ wives. In Dad’s family it was a bit more recent. I thank God frequently for stepping into his life while he was still a teenager and bringing redemption to the whole family. I got a dad and a mom of the highest character who both love Jesus and taught their children to do the same. Though none of us has been without a few missteps along the way, we are all learning to love Him too. I can think of no greater blessings than these two, and it brings me joy to tell of them.

I’ve already written at some length of the wisdom of my parents in the way they raised me. I won’t brag on them too much more here, but I can’t list the greatest blessings in my life and leave that out. For teaching me to be all that I can be and never making my blindness an obstacle, I owe them a debt that cannot be repaid. I have seen what happens when children with disabilities are hobbled by well meaning parents who do everything for them and never allow them to grow up. Many go through life effectively retarded not by any mental deficiency of their own, but by the environment in which they were raised. My parents showed surpassing wisdom in this as well as other aspects of my upbringing. I am inspired to help other parents and children receives the same benefit, though I have not found an outlet for this yet.

That one such as I could find someone to love and be loved by is still amazing to me, but she’s right there in the next room as I write this. I still question whether it should have happened. I am not worthy of such a blessing. Yet there she is, and I appreciate her more and more as time goes by.

All of this is taking place in a country that despite its problems remains the best place in the world to live. I pray that we return to Yahweh as a nation before that changes, but I fear it is already too late. As I pray, I thank Him for putting me here. The neediest among us live in luxury compared to the majority of the world’s population. We still for the most part have the freedom to worship Him as we choose. We can still boldly speak His name and proclaim His salvation. I urge you to use and protect that freedom by first sharing the good news and also by voting thoughtfully.

I thank the Lord also for the time in which I live. Never has there been so much opportunity. The life I enjoy would not have been possible even just a few decades ago. I write this from a computer that speaks the words I cannot see, and I use the same technology to make my living.

So I find myself rejoicing this morning for all the good that God has done. I am blessed beyond measure, and there is a purpose in it. I am blessed that I may be a blessing to others. In so doing I will find even greater reward. My hope is that even in this writing I will encourage you to reflect on what God has given to you and to find ways to share it with those around you.

Letter to a Familiar Stranger

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I wrote this open letter a few years ago with a couple of people in mind who I had recently met and learned their stories.  I am moved to share it again.  It could be written to so many.

What can I say? Are there any words that would make a difference? How can I, living as I say that all should live and yet rarely joyful, claim that I know the path to peace, fulfillment, and happiness? I know that if I hold back because of my own imperfection I will never be able to share what little wisdom God has allowed me, so with open acknowledgement that I have not yet managed to fully apply the truth I know, I try to pass it along.

Should I dare to speak to someone whose life and experience are so different than mine? Can I offer anything that someone old enough to be my parent would be able to receive? I have certainly known the pain of loss, but each loss is different. I know what betrayal feels like, but not on the scale that some have seen it. In truth my life has been good. That I cannot see well is a huge frustration but I wouldn’t trade the life I’ve been given to gain the ability to see. What is that against the love of a family, the wisdom of good parents, and most of all the love of Yahweh? If I can point to tragedy in my life it has been that of my own making, and even there God has spared me. I was brought up in the Truth, and that kept me from much that destroys life.

Maybe it is only this that I can offer. I have hope in Yahweh. There is no hope in religious ritual. It may provide the solace of the familiar, but there is no life in it. True worshipers may exist within its context, but in itself it does not promote true worship. Church as most of us define it is no church at all. The church is comprised of true followers of Jesus, not of congregants in a particular building, group, or denomination. It is among such true believers that one may hope to find a small sample of the love that Yahweh intended for us to share. These people are rarer than even the shrinking rolls of church attendees would indicate. Once discovered, they too will fail us at times, because they like us are flawed. The only one in whom we may have unshakable trust is Yahweh, the God of the Bible.

But He designed us to operate in community. We were not meant to function in isolation. In isolation we cannot receive His love through His people, nor can we give it. The latter is crucial. When we give Jesus our lives and are thus reborn, we have within us His nature and are compelled to act as He would. We cannot be healthy unless we are doing what He does. As I live my life I become more and more convinced that the only path to consistent and lasting joy is in service to others, which is service to Yahweh. WE love Him by loving each other.

Those are pretty words, but they seem to crumble to dust upon the slightest brush with reality. The best of us fail, and most of us are not the best of us. We tend to be selfish, ungrateful, spiteful, and without real love. To love and give of oneself only to have more demanded without so much as a word of gratitude seems to pull that joy I spoke of well out of reach. This is why we need others around us. We need a community of godly people who will stand with us. It is more blessed to give than to receive, but if one never receives he runs out of anything to give. I for one would rather that everything I need come straight from God. He’s the one who will never fail. But God means for His people to be conduits for His love. By denying others the opportunity to give to me, I deny them the opportunity to be blessed by the giving and act out God’s nature in their own lives. This is tough when trust has been often betrayed, but there is healing in it.

I also hurt for those who choose to reject God’s best for them. What can I say that would help you understand? The love you seek cannot be found in a relationship devoid of commitment. The pain you hope to soothe will only grow worse as your soul becomes further divided among partners who themselves have no notion of love beyond what pleases them or seems to fill their own emptiness. What will you do if you should find true love and discover that you have too little left to share? God does not wish to take love away from you. He wishes to give it to you. He is not out to take all joy from your life, but to show you the way to more joy than you imagine possible. Loving Father that He is, he guides us away from the things that will hurt us and toward that which is best for us. He is also just, and though He would not have it so, He must eventually judge those who will not listen to the truth. This above all I would spare you, for there is no greater sorrow than to be separated forever from the lover who would never have left you. Come to Him. He does not seek religious ritual. He cares little which label you wear. I think He would prefer that you wear no label at all. He wants your heart. If you give yourself to Him, He will guide you to the love you seek. He is known as Jesus, the god of the universe made flesh to die so that you can live. He is Yahweh, the eternal Father who loved you enough to sacrifice His own son to have you back. There is no greater love.

Broken Families

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I suspect most of us have encountered them.  Those families that seem to be perfect.  Husband and wife express love for each other.  The kids are well behaved.  They might have come right off a TV script.  Maybe depending on your own family background you longed to be a part of that family.  It is certainly true that when a family is led by God’s principles, there is a greater chance for harmony.  I am extremely grateful that ours was so led.  Many families experience seasons of tranquility, but I think if we could look a little deeper, we’d find there’s brokenness in all of them.  They are after all made up of broken people.

I have been thinking about this lately, as my own family has experienced it in ways we never could have imagined would happen to us.  It got me thinking about what Jesus said.

34 “Do not think that I came to bring peace on the earth; I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I came to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; 36 and a man’s enemies will be the members of his household. (Matt 10:34-36)

We usually read this thinking about the obvious difference between those who believe in Jesus and those who do not, but there’s another level here.  Everyone who whom Jesus was speaking would say they were followers of Yahweh.  They were Jews, God’s chosen people.  The division here is between Jew and Jew of the same family and presumably the same religion.  The difference is Jesus.

Jesus causes another kind of division within families.  It is between those who profess to follow Him and those who practice it.  Jesus also said, “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and in his own household.” (Matt 13:57)  When we insist on the truth, we may be called liars.  When we choose good over evil, love over hatred, and mercy over judgment, we may find it just as he said.  Our most deadly enemies will come from our own family.

That isn’t to say there is not brokenness all around.  Sometimes the problem is that no one is in the right.  The solution, however, is the same.  We must all examine our hearts.  We must all be willing to confess our own sin and in turn offer forgiveness.  Sometimes it seems that relationships are broken beyond repair.  I confess to feeling that way.  God is going to have to do a miracle for us, but He is able to do that, and we all pray for that miracle.

Paste On That Smile!

The Lion's Roar Posted on by
Larry sitting in an office chair with a large monitor on a mounting arm behind his left shoulder. He wears khaki shorts and a black t-shirt reading "KNOW JESUS KNOW PEACE." The letters K and W are lighter, so that the word NO is highlighted, given the contrasting message.

I live and work in this chair

I’m sure you’ve heard it repeatedly if you’ve been in church very long.  Christians ought to be joyful.  People should look at us and want what we have.  What kind of witnesses are we if we go around looking miserable all the time?

I don’t disagree with that, but it has to be more than superficial.  I think about it when I’m out somewhere wearing one of the several Christian themed shirts that my wife has bought me over the years.  Last night was a typical example.  It wasn’t the one in the picture, but I’m sure I’ve been in the same situation wearing that particularly relevant message.

Grocery shopping, especially when the store is crowded, can be a stressful experience for Linda and me.  What used to be a joy when we were just getting to know each other and she was helping me quickly became a hated chore for both of us for different reasons.  Over time we’ve learned to do it and at least come home still friends, and we’re both grateful for the other’s help.  She can see it and I can reach it.  But it’s still something we tend to put off until necessity demands it.

So once again last evening I was walking through the store and became conscious of the frown I was wearing.  I made a conscious effort several times to replace the frown with a smile, but it didn’t reach my heart and so didn’t stay long.

What I need is perspective.  Walking through that store is indicative of God’s abundant blessing in my life.  Where do I start?  Roughly 70% of blind people are unemployed.  We are buying what we want and we will pay for it with money we made.  We arrived ere in a van adapted so that Linda can drive it and we aren’t dependent on public transportation.  Every time we see a bus on the way, Linda says, “There’s the bus we’re not on!”  We were on it for a while a couple of years back.

I am with my wife who I love and who loves me.  We have one of the happiest and most peaceful marriages I know of.  She is a woman of rare strength and integrity and I am blessed beyond measure to be married to her.

I could go on.  My life is full of blessing.  I live in a country where, though that freedom IS under assault, we still have the freedom to live as we choose.  I thank God often for the wise and bodly parents who raised me.  As the years go by I see more and more how His hand orchestrated even my own failures to bring me  to the place where He wanted me to be.  Shame on me for that fake smile.  I have good reason for rejoicing.  Most of all, I will delight that Jesus is our Lord.  The day will come when the sufferings of this temporal life will seem trivial.  Though I don’t believe they are.  They are part of the process that God uses to form the character that we will take with us into eternity.

So the next time you encounter one of those little or not so little bumps in the road of life, think about the fact that you’re on the road.  Remember to let God do the driving, and delight in the destination.

Moving On

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

I finally did it!  I’ve been planning to change hosting companies ever since Web Hero took it upon themselves to make changes to my site without so much as an email for explanation.  I understand why they did what they did and I’ve even started using one of the plugins they installed on our church’s web site.  They were all security related.

However, some of them contain overlapping functionality.  As stated, no information was provided to me regarding what was to be done, why, and what if anything I should do once it was done.  There have been reliability problems for years and they have only gotten worse.  Now I can’t tell whether changes I made or changes they forced upon me are the cause when something goes wrong. Had I been attempting to run a business with the site, I probably would have moved long ago, but this inconsiderate and arrogant action was the final straw.

If I needed any further confirmation that it is time to go, when I went to visit my site and collect some information I would need for the transfer, I found it down. To their credit, Web Hero staff did get it back for me, apparently by restoring an earlier backup of the site.  A much of stuff has to be upgraded again now.  Of course the possibility is that one of those upgrades was the culprit, so I’m moving carefully.  I was told that I would be notified when service was restored, but I wasn’t.

I have not decided whether I want to let the new company, HostGator,  try to migrate the site as it is or just start fresh.  This post is going up on the old host.  So, for the occasional random reader who might pass through, now you know why you might see or might have seen a disruption to the site.

What Were They Thinking by Alan Turner

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

This came from one of the men in a Bible study I attend and it was too good not to share.

The recent hack of Ashley Madison, the adultery website, has produced a lot of angst.  Not the least of which, however, is the complaint of the damage caused by the hack and the subsequent revelations.  Others lament the shame now brought on to people because they choose to live to a different set of values.
 
They are missing the point, but, you already knew that.  Numbers 32:23 says, “But if you will not do so, behold, you have sinned against the Lord, and be sure your sin will find you out.”  This is from a specific context in Numbers, but I’m sure it has a legitimate universal application.    We are not the arbiters of what is and is not a sin.
 
Clearly there are those outside the body of Christ, and probably inside as well, who think they can conceal their actions and have a reasonable expectation of privacy.  Not so fast there.
 
Where shall I go from your Spirit?
    Or where shall I flee from your presence?
 If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
    If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
 If I take the wings of the morning
    and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
 even there your hand shall lead me,
    and your right hand shall hold me.
 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
    and the light about me be night,”
 even the darkness is not dark to you;
    the night is bright as the day,
    for darkness is as light with you.
 
Psalm 139: 7-12
 
If we can’t escape God’s piercing gaze in the depths of hell or Davy Jones’ Locker, what expectation can we have that a little data encryption and a password will put us beyond his reach?
 
The people who resent the hack of Ashley Madison, but not the conduct that put people in the middle of that hack, are typical of the world.  They want freedom without judgment, actions without consequences.  Ironically, that freedom extends to the freedom to be secretive and not be exposed, even though they see nothing wrong with what they do…or do they?
 
We all know John 3:16, but reading a few verses beyond gives us this,
 
 And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil. For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.  But whoever does what is true comes to the light, so that it may be clearly seen that his works have been carried out in God.”
 
Why is it that most — there will always be exhibitionists — who think that what they do is acceptable (for them), want to keep it hidden in the dark?  In Revelation 6, the great and the small who wanted to hide from God’s judgment were so desperate that they wanted the mountains to “fall on us and hide us from the face of him who is seated on the throne.”  Their distress was not directed at what they had done, but who was holding them accountable.
 
My dog does that, too.  If I grab him by the scruff of his neck when he’s not doing what I want him to do, he howls and whines, not at any pain or injury, but at the simple action of being made to do what he doesn’t want to do.  His overreaction is somewhat comical.  Methinks he doth protest too much (a Shakespearean paraphrase). 
 
Everybody knows when they’ve done wrong.  It’s one of the downsides of “knowing good and evil” (Gen. 3:22).  Knowing good and evil is one thing.  Being able to do anything about it is entirely a different matter…and it’s where we fail so miserably. 
 
Before there was Shakespeare, there was God and this verse sounds like something straight out of one of the Bard’s plays:
 
Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.” Wake up from your drunken stupor, as is right, and do not go on sinning.
 
1 Corinthians 15:33-34
 
It’s an interesting admonition there:  “wake up”.  Stop fooling around with things that are legally permissible, but not beneficial.  If they were only neutral, we might actually think they were worth it.  But there are darned few places of genuine neutrality.
 
There are those whose names were exposed by the Ashley Madison hack who claim, maybe rightly, that while they signed up, they never did anything with it.  Maybe, but imagine having to explain that to your wife / husband and kids.  Hanging around with the “bad company” of Ashley Madison has consequences or, as Benjamin Franklin is attributed as saying, “if you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.”  Even if they weren’t your fleas and even if you didn’t bring them to the party, the consequences of having fleas are all the same.
 
The complaint that the hack revelations are destructive miss, and dismiss, the root cause.  Yes, families, relationships, and careers will be damaged and maybe destroyed because of the exposure.  However, the real villain here is not the hack, but the behavior.  People who didn’t go to the Ashley Madison website have nothing to fear from the hack.  Those who did deliberately placed themselves and others in harms way long before the hack

Planning Public Prayer?

The Lion's Roar Posted on by

Last Monday I delivered the invocation for the second general session of the 2015 convention of the American Counsel of the Blind.  As I was considering what I might say, I was troubled by a question that has bothered me in the past when I knew I would be asked to pray publicly.  Should one plan a prayer?  I think about Jesus’ words in Matthew 6:5, where he warns not to make a show of praying to be seen by others.

So I asked Him, and another passage came to mind.  This is Jesus speaking just before he called Lazarus from the grave.

41 … Then Jesus raised His eyes, and said, “Father, I thank You that You have heard Me.  42 I knew that You always hear Me; but because of the people standing around I said it, so that they may believe that You sent Me.” (John 11:41-42 NASB)

The problem is not public prayer.  Jesus Himself did that.  It’s not even public prayer with a purpose.  You see here that Jesus did that too.  The problem is, as with most things, what is in your heart.  So I asked Him to guide me and rehearsed what I would say.  It didn’t come out exactly like I wanted it, but I’m thankful for what I learned in doing it.  Primarily for the benefit of friends and family who have asked, here’s the clip from the session.

Cruel Compassion

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A righteous man has regard for the life of his animal,

But even the compassion of the wicked is cruel. (Prov 10:12 NASB)

What does this mean? Isn’t compassion by nature almost an opposite to cruelty? We might say it another way. Compassion applied from a corrupt value system is cruelty. It is a particularly insidious cruelty because it looks like compassion and is often mistaken for the real thing.

To understand this better we need to look at how the word is being used here. In this context we can apply it the way we use it in our modern vernacular. We tend to use the word to imply compassionate actions or compassion expressed. The New King James renders the word “tender mercies.” Holman reads “merciful acts.”

Our society is full of examples of cruel compassion. Since this verse starts out talking about animals, let’s start with that. In this nation and across the world we have advocates for the “rights” of animals. Few would argue that it’s acceptable to inflict needless suffering on another living creature. Here we are told that it is a characteristic of righteousness to look after the animals entrusted to our care. That appropriate compassion becomes corrupted when animals are elevated to a status equal to or even above human beings. When farms go without water for the sake of a fish in California, when people die from malaria in third world countries because of the banning of pesticides to save birds, “compassion” is cruel.

In the name of compassion we provide for the needy, and we should, but is it compassion when we do it in such a way that they have no incentive to improve their condition? This compassion is cruel. “No child in America should go hungry,” we are told. Rightly so, but when we provide for them in a way that takes from them the fathers who would provide for them much more than physical sustenance, our compassion is cruel! Just look in our inner city neighborhoods, our schools, and our prisons.

We are told the stories of young women who make foolish choices or are deplorably used by others. We are told that compassion requires that we permit them the option of abortion. We inflict upon the mother another life-long wound and take away a human life. This is the compassion of the wicked, and this compassion is horribly cruel!

Who determines the value of life? Who decides when it is a life worth living? What happens when we do not agree? The soul in the midst of suffering cries out for relief. We suffer with it, and we wonder if compassion might demand that we make the suffering stop. But we do not know the future. Some children will never grow up, but no one can measure the impact of a life lived out with the innocence of a child. The best doctors have been befuddled by both young and old who defied the odds and went on living. A compassion that demands human life as it’s due is the compassion of the wicked, and it is cruel!

You’ve Got to Change Your Ways

An Uber Solution

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The National Federation of the Blind of California is suing Uber, a taxi alternative that employs private drivers in their personal vehicles. The service connects drivers and customers via a smartphone app. Rides with the basic service level are slightly less expensive than a taxi as well as quick and convenient. No money changes hands. The transaction is handled entirely through the app. I have used the service here in the Dallas area and I am delighted with it. I had a little trouble on my very first ride because the driver didn’t really know the area and followed his arrant GPS, but Uber made it right. The taxi companies hate it because it has disrupted the cozy pay-to-play relationship they have developed with most major cities.

Both the genius and the weakness of this system are the same, the reliance on private drivers. The NFB suit alleges systemic mistreatment of blind passengers with service animals. Here’s a brief summary I turned up with a web search. They claim to have been in talks with Uber that have not resulted in an acceptable solution. Given the history of the NFB, I wonder how much effort really went into finding a good solution. The NFB can be an unreasonable bully. I’ll grant you the stories are not good and I don’t doubt these things happened, and Uber’s contention that because they use privately contracted drivers they can do little about it also rings a little hollow.

It seems to me that this problem is easily addressed. There are always going to be drivers who don’t want a dog in their car. It’s the same with taxis. What if the driver is allergic to dogs? Does he or she not have the same rights as anyone else? Instead of trying to bully every driver into accepting a passenger with a dog, why not add a feature to the app that allows the rider to indicate that they need a driver who will? It can be made a feature of the user’s account so that it’s always part of the ride request but can be toggled off if the dog is not present for a specific trip. In fact, a similar feature would be handy anyway. On my first trip, I realized that I was going to have a problem if the driver didn’t know to look for me because I would not see him. I don’t have a dog, but if the driver automatically knew he was picking up a blind person, he could proceed accordingly. The app does allow for a message to be sent to the driver, which is what I did. I do have a little vision, which leads me to another suggestion. The app tells you what kind of car is coming, but not what color it is. The color would help everyone looking for the driver.

It’s too bad we can’t work out our problems without resorting to expensive and harmful law suits. It makes me ashamed. I find myself feeling the need to apologize for all of us who are blind, even though the NFB does not represent even most of us. We have real problems, but if we work together to solve them we’ll all be better off. Compliance is not the same thing as cooperation. Force compliance and no one is happy. The compelled will do the minimum necessary. The compeller will never be satisfied with the results.

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