I do not remember being afraid of monsters in the closet, but I do remember nightmares full of strange and frightening sensations that would drive me from my room to seek the comfort of my parents. I was not exposed to scary stories at that age, but my mind supplied the scare anyway. We grow to understand that our childish fears are unreasonable, but that doesn’t stop our imaginations from generating new monsters. Sometimes they grow out of real threats. At other times, they are just as insubstantial as the ones hiding in our closets when we were kids. I fought one of them yesterday.

I have been experiencing some troubling symptoms that affect my vision. Upon sharing them with my doctor, he referred me to a neuro-ophthalmologist. I pushed aside my misgivings and set up an appointment, but as I reviewed the new patient information and filled out the forms, the anxiety began to build.

I have become somewhat mistrustful of doctors over the years. I believe most mean to do good, but I have come to doubt that they really know how to do good in many cases. This one still insists on mask wearing, which makes me doubt him more. My eye condition requires some patience on the part of the physician and staff, as I can’t always reliably get my eyes to do what they are asking. Eye exams are stressful for me and everyone working with me. As my condition is not likely to change and there is little or nothing to be done for it, I usually avoid them. On top of it all, the potential causes of the symptoms I have been experiencing include some scary possibilities.

So, after a night plagued with bad dreams, I got off to a rough start, arriving late for my appointment. That didn’t help my state of mind. The stress caused the symptoms to make an appearance. As I sat in the exam room waiting for the doctor, I reflected on what I was feeling. I knew that my response to the circumstance was out of proportion to its gravity. I know that my Lord is in control and will bring good from whatever comes next. I began to softly sing an old tune created from Psalm 27:1 in the King James version, “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” From that point, I began to get control of my anxiety. The examination was not so bad. The doctor immediately understood what I was telling him, and we ended up where I thought we would. More information is needed, so the next step is an MRI.

I created one of those imaginary monsters. There was absolutely no reason to fear. I knew going in that it was unlikely that I would receive an answer that day. I didn’t even need to be concerned with what I might learn. So, my heavenly Father came in, turned on the light, opened the closet, and showed me there was nothing in there but all my junk.

I don’t imagine there will be good news forthcoming next week unless God steps in and fixes something. I’m certainly asking. I do know that I have seen Him bring good from our circumstances time and time again. Whatever comes next, I know where my help comes from. My help comes from Yahweh! (Psalm 121)