Moments of Truth
I hesitate to write this, because the players in the drama may read it, and I don’t want to give offense. That sounds like good enough reason not to write it, but I also think it wouldn’t be a bad thing to have things out in the open that I lack the courage to say in person. Another reason I question whether I should write this in a public forum is that if indeed we are doing good I do not want to glorify us. God gets the glory. However, as you will soon see if anyone this side of Heaven deserves glory it isn’t me. I guess it’s ok if I make my wife look good. J
About two weeks ago, we took in a woman who has no place to live. Linda had met her once before a couple of years ago, but her circumstances have changed since that first meeting. I don’t think it would be right to divulge any details here, and I question how many of those details we really know. The short version is that before I knew it we were committed to have her live with us for an indeterminate period of time to help her get what she needs. At first I was angry. We hadn’t talked about it before the offer was made, and now I had someone I didn’t know or have any reason to trust staying in my home. I got past that. I can hardly fault my beloved wife for having a compassionate reaction to the situation. Knowing that the alternative was for the woman to be out in the freezing weather, how could I refuse? Since then I have had my own compassionate moments, but over all I am still on high alert. Maybe it’s the lessons I learned from my first marriage, or maybe it’s just plain ugly selfishness, but I fear we have gotten ourselves into a situation far beyond our experience and means.
This has caused me to take a hard look at myself. Some of you may have read my Christmas blog entry. I preached a variation on it last Sunday. Is my heart where my mouth is? Where is my love and compassion? I think I have to admit that for all my talk most of the time all I really want is for my normal, safe life to continue on the same as it was before. It’s fine to talk about love and compassion, but it’s too messy when it knocks on your door. Yet here I am, and I pray that I am doing the right thing. I ask all who know us to pray for our beloved visitor and for us. Pray that the whole truth will be revealed and that His wisdom will become evident to all of us.